E de tudo isso que acontece com a gente, não há o que pensar, nem sentir e nem mesmo tomar alguma atitude coerente...ficamos à mercê do tempo que não existe ou dos nossos vazios tão cheios de coisas incompreensíveis.
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Talvez eu fique esperando uma interferência externa já que cansei de esperar de mim... Talvez deva esperar algo fora de mim, já que esse é o único ato não realizado... será que tornou-se prepotência saber que tudo reside em mim, que tudo termina em mim e que nunca tive saída por outro lugar?
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Imagino que poderia sair dessa lama e virar uma lótus, mas estou cansada de todas as tentativas e já me cansei de procurar outras tantas que talvez conseguisse... Não apago e nem queimo, não acendo e muito menos me ascendo...fico esperando o fogo me queimar INTEIRA e virar poeira cósmica...
Quisera poder dormir de vez, já que ando sonolenta, mas o resquício de lucidez é um tormento constante... agora até entendo Nietzsche e aquela sua maldita ponte por onde não ia nem vinha....que droga!
Talvez eu fique esperando uma interferência externa já que cansei de esperar de mim... Talvez deva esperar algo fora de mim, já que esse é o único ato não realizado... será que tornou-se prepotência saber que tudo reside em mim, que tudo termina em mim e que nunca tive saída por outro lugar?
Estariam todas as minhas concepções equivocadas? Bom, se assim for resta alguma esperança? Ou seriam apenas devaneios de quem vive a devanear?
Será que preciso quebrar mais alguma coisa? Será que ainda resta algum pedaço para ser esmigalhado e está escondido nos recôncavos de mim?
Não sei se vou ou fico... Imóvel diante de mim... Esperando a palavra mágica brotar da minha boca... Ela, que a tudo varre, a tudo move e a tudo mexe... E dá movimento na ordem e no caos.
Elizabeth
30 comentários:
Certa vez "ouvi" uma voz que me disse:
"Só os loucos encontrarão a verdade".
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